A Freakin Christmas Special
by familyguyfan
Summary: Town drunk Peter Griffin gets a visit by 3 ghosts to learn the true meaning of Christmas.


It was Christmas Eve in Quahog. Peter was a stubborn 40 years old during this time of year. He hated Christmas. He would work at the brewery all day Christmas Eve and all day Christmas day. Later on in the story, Peter will learn something that he had never known about. For now, he's just being a Scrooge. It was snowing outside and Peter was wearing a heavy black jacket. He liked the cold. Whenever he passed someone on the street they'd get a chill through their bodies. Once Peter arrived at the brewery, his workers gasped and stood frozen. "Get back to work!" Peter ordered.

Peter's workers jumped and immediately got back to their work. Brian walked up to Peter with a big stack of papers and said, "I finished the companies taxes. We have made $30,000 this year." Peter glared at Brian with a stern look and said, "We're behind from last year. We were supposed to make $50,000 this year. What happened?" Brian looked down at the ground nervously and told Peter sheepishly, "Well Peter, I hate to say this but we've been working for 3 years in a row trying to make money for the company. Hell we hardly get paid."

Peter took off his top hat and told Brian, "Money is like a girlfriend. You have to use it wisely." Brain sighed and said, "If you're not going to pay us at all, the least you could do is give us the day off." Everyone stopped working and Peter scoffed, "Humbug." Silence filled the room. "Why so negative?" Brian asked. "Nobody gets a day off ever! If nobody works one day then we don't get money." Peter explained. "All I ask is for the day off tomorrow. I mean it's Christmas." Brian begged.

"HUMBUG!" Peter yelled. "But I'll only allow you to come in late. How about 8:30?"

Brian frowned and said, "Coming into work 30 minutes later than usual doesn't work. I want to spend time with the family."

"HUMBUG!" Peter shouted again. "Who needs Christmas anyway? I'm a hard worker! I want money!" Someone suddenly knocked at the door. Peter answered the door and saw Cleveland Junior singing. "Jingle bells jingle bells, jingle all the way!" he sung. "What do you want?" Peter asked. "I'm raising money for the orphanage across the street." He explained.

"Humbug." Peter said under his breath.

Cleveland who stood beside Cleveland Junior stopped Peter from closing the door and said, "Peter, it would be a great honor if you gave money to the orphanage. Besides Loretta is in no longer care for Cleveland Junior and I. At least donate $1." Peter had a thought in his head. A nasty thought in his head. It was so diabolical Peter pulled out a bottle of beer from the brewery and said, "Here's my donation!" Cleveland Junior sobbed and said to Cleveland, "Daddy! What are we ever going to do? The orphanage isn't going to want alcohol." "Don't worry Cleveland Junior, I'll just hope they accept my VISA card." Cleveland explained as they left the brewery.

Once they left Peter opened the bottle of beer and drank the whole bottle. Peter burped and said silently, "Humbug." When Peter closed the door Brian was on his knees and pleaded, "Peter, tomorrows Christmas. Please give us the day off so we can spend time with our families." Peter sighed as he opened another bottle of beer and said, "Fine! Everyone can have the day off tomorrow!" Brian stood up and said, "Thank you very much! Happy holidays to you!" Peter stopped Brian before he could go out the door and said, "But you guys have to close down the shop." "Yes sir!" Brian said excitedly.

When Peter left the brewery he made his way home. It was getting dark outside on Christmas Eve. It was nearly 10:00 PM and Peter was in his pajamas. Peter heard a strange noise coming from the cupboard. "Who goes there?" Peter asked suspiciously. There was no response. Peter sighed and lied in bed. Suddenly the lights went out in his house. "WHAT THE HELL?" Peter hollered. Peter lit a candle and searched around the house to see what was going on. "I was about to watch Sex in the City and all of the sudden the power goes off. It better not be you Joe!" Peter yelled out the window. "Hey shut up Peter! We're trying to sleep over here!"

"What the duce is going on out there?" Stewie yelled from his window.

"Who's baby was that?" Cleveland yelled out his window.

"Shut up chocolate person!" Stewie yelled.

Peter closed his window and silently said, "Humbug." All of a sudden a glowing light appeared in front of Peter and the ghost of Quagmire appeared. "Quagmire? Is that you?" Peter asked. "Yes Peter. It's me. Glen Quagmire. I used to be your drinking buddy." Quagmire said.

"How the hell did you die?" Peter asked.

"Remember the frat party in 1975?" Quagmire asked.

"Oh yeah." Peter said remembering the past. "So how's Heaven serving you?"

Quagmire sighed and said, "I couldn't get in. I've done some bad things. I mean they had to give me a prostate exam and I guess I failed the exam to get into Heaven. But I'm a ghost and I guess I get what I deserve. Anyway you're going to get visited by 3 ghosts. The first ghost will come at the stroke of 1."

"Am I high or something?" Peter asked.

"No Peter you aren't!" Quagmire said and disappeared.

Peter crawled into bed and the lights came back on and Peter turned off the light on the nightstand and said softly, "Humbug."

At the stroke of 1:00, Peter heard a strange noise. He woke up and remembered that the first ghost comes at 1. Adam West appeared in front of Peter. "Are you the first ghost that seeks before me?" Peter asked. Adam West looked at Peter and said, "It is I the ghost of Christmas past. I'm Adam West. I was your first and last customer from your brewery."

"What happened?" Peter asked. "Your beer killed me. Someone poisoned it." Adam explained. "What are you going to do to me?" Peter asked nervously. "I'm here to take you to your past." Adam explained. Peter scoffed and said, "What past? Peter Griffin doesn't have a past!"

Adam West grabbed Peter by his hand and a bright light appeared. Seconds later, Peter was in 1975. "What happened?" Peter asked confused. Adam West pointed at Peter as a kid and said, "We're in your childhood. That's you as a kid. When you were 10 years old, your father ran commercials for Tom Pocket Pats brewery. Ever since then you have dreamt of having your own brewery." Young Peter was playing Kick the Can with Quagmire and said to Quagmire, "Hey Quagmire, one day I'm going to be just like my dad and have my own brewery. It's going to be great. Heck one day I'll be drinking until I can't feel any feelings anymore."

"Sweet! I don't even know what a feeling is! I want to fly planes one day!" kid Quagmire said. A bright light flashed in front of Peter and Adam West and Adam said, "Now it's Christmas Eve 1984. You dropped out of college and helped your dad run the brewery." Teenage Peter walked up to Francis Griffin and said, "Hey dad, the Mexican workers you hired are doing a poor job calculating our spending costs for this year. What do I do?"

"What do you think? Get the pointy stick and jab them." Francis told Teenage Peter.

Teenage Peter sighed and threw the stick from Francis's hands at the Mexican worker. "What am I going to do after you die?" Teenage Peter asked. "When I die you're going to take over for me and be just like me!" Francis replied. "What about Christmas?" Peter asked.

There was a long pause. Francis sighed and said, "Humbug."

Peter covered his eyes as a light flashed him and Adam West to his bedroom. It was 1:30 AM and Adam West disappeared. Peter looked out the window and saw snow falling from the sky. "Holly crap! It can't be." Peter said softly to himself.

At 2 AM, the clock rung once again. Meg appeared and Peter woke up and said, "Meg! You're the ghost of Christmas Present?" Meg nodded and said, "Remember the time you sawed my arm off on Halloween 2 years ago?" Meg asked. Peter nodded and asked, "Do you really have no sense of humor?" Meg grabbed Peter and said, "I'm the Ghost of Christmas Present. I'm going to show you what Christmas would look like if you haven't changed." A big light flashed and Peter appeared in front of Brian's home. "What are we doing here?" Peter asked. Meg forced Peter to look through the window of Brian's home. Brian took off his jacket and said to Lois, "Sorry I'm home late. It was a long day at the office." Lois sighed as she put the turkey on the table, "I just don't get why Peter would force you to work on Christmas. Just imagine how the kids feel."

"Kids?" Peter asked Meg.

"You really are stupid aren't you?" Meg said.

"Well sorry for being a little drunk!" Peter said annoyed.

Chris and Stewie entered the kitchen and Stewie told Lois, "Oh mother I made a wonderful picture today. It's a picture of a Christmas Tree." Brian took Stewie's picture and cried. "It's beautiful." Brian said as he wiped his tears. "Ewww now there's tears on my picture. Good going dog." Stewie said and ran away from the table. Peter cried a little bit and said to Meg, "I wish to see no more."

A big flash of light appeared once again and Peter appeared alone in his room. It was nearly sunrise and Peter said, "I'm going to have to get some sleep. It's almost morning and Christmas is near."

The clock stroke at 3 AM and a bright light appeared and Death tapped Peter as he rested in his bed. "Death? Is that you?" Peter asked. Death put down his cell phone in his hand and said, "Sorry about that. My mom called. She wanted me home before 6. I really hope I get a shrunken head for Christmas. Anyway come with me and I'll show you you're future."

"My future?" Peter asked.

A bright light appeared and Peter appeared in a graveyard. Death pointed to a blank tombstone and told Peter, "If you don't change before Christmas morning, you will die." Lightning struck the tombstone and the tombstone read, "R.I.P Peter Griffin: The Most selfishness person ever" Peter fell on his knees and cried, "Why am I so selfish?" Death glared at Peter and asked, "Did you realize that you made the wrong choice?"

Peter dried his tears and said, "Yes. Thank you Death for showing me the true meaning of Christmas."

A light appeared and Peter was in his bed. His alarm clock went off at 7:00. Peter sprung from his bed, poked his head out the window and asked, "Excuse me sir, what day is today?" Cleveland held up his calendar and said, "It's Christmas! Get a calendar moron!" Peter rushed downstairs and out of his house and ran to Brian's home. Peter rung the doorbell and Brian answered. "Peter?" Brian asked. "What are you doing here?"

"I have great news!" Peter yelled with excitement. "I realized last night that I've been a Scrooge and I feel guilty for how I acted. I decided to give you 2 weeks off!"

"Oh that's wonderful!" Brian said with excitement. "Thank you Peter."

"Who's at the door?" Lois asked.

"It's Peter. He gave me 2 weeks off from work." Brian said as he lifted Stewie in the air. "Oh my God put me down!" Stewie yelled as he was in mid air.

Peter rushed towards Cleveland and gave him $20 and said, "I would like to make a true donation."

"Thank you Peter. Now the orphanage will be happy again. Merry Christmas Peter." Cleveland said.

"Merry Christmas." Peter smiled.

The End


End file.
